Journi's Story
Journi May was a son who was loved, mourned, and remembered.
Sarah and Phillip lost Journi during the second trimester of pregnancy. Alongside the grief of losing their son, they were confronted with another difficulty: they did not know what respectful options were available to them, who could help, or whether Journi could be laid to rest in the way they hoped.
Their experience became the beginning of a much larger question — why should any grieving family have to search for these answers on its own?
Journi at approximately 9 weeks ("BABY" was added by the imaging lab.
The Loss & Searching for Answers
Sarah and Phillip’s pregnancy had brought the ordinary hopes and expectations that come with preparing for a child.
When Journi died during the second trimester, those expectations were replaced suddenly by grief and uncertainty.
They were mourning their son while also trying to understand what would happen next. Could Journi be buried? Were religious or memorial options available? Who were they supposed to ask?
With the assistance of Father Sean Flynn, they began to understand what could be done. Their experience showed how heavily a grieving family can depend upon finding the right person, asking the right question, or simply encountering someone who knows what options exist.
That should not be left to chance.
A Dignified Farewell
With the assistance of Father Sean Flynn and St. Francis Xavier Cemetery in Cobble Hill, British Columbia, Sarah and Phillip were ultimately able to arrange a burial for Journi.
Phillip made a small casket for his son. Sarah made a pillow for him.
Journi was laid to rest with prayer, reverence, and the recognition that mattered most to his parents: he was their child.
Their grief was not removed by being able to bury Journi, but they were given the opportunity to say goodbye in a way that reflected their love for him and their beliefs.
"To us, he wasn't just some hospital sample or medical case. We were simply looking at our sweet son."
- Phillip
In Their Own Words
Sarah's - Journi's Mom
Phillip - Journi's Dad
The following are abridged versions of Sarah’s and Phillip’s testimonies. They wanted to share as much of their experience as possible in the hope that other families facing this most heartbreaking of losses may find comfort in their words, greater understanding of the choices available to them, and access to options that Sarah and Phillip had to discover largely on their own.
"When we learned that Journi had died, my heart broke into pieces. I understood the medical information I was given, but for me this was never only a medical event. Journi was our son, and I had an overwhelming desire to protect his body and give him the respect he deserved.
After I miscarried at home, Phillip and I were able to see and hold him. Then came another kind of uncertainty. We did not know what we were allowed to do next, what options existed for laying our baby to rest, or where we should turn for help. No one talks about what to do in a situation like this.
Our faith became very important to us. Through the Church we found people who understood that Journi deserved to be treated with dignity. I will always be grateful that, at a time of such loss, we were given the opportunity to lay our son to rest with prayer, love, and respect.
I hope that other families experiencing pregnancy loss will be given clear information and compassionate support without having to search for it themselves."
"When Sarah miscarried, what I saw was not tissue or a medical specimen. We were looking upon our son.
Journi was very small, but he was clearly and beautifully formed. Sarah and I wanted to treat him with the same tenderness and respect that any parent would want for a child they had lost.
We returned home and prepared a small casket for him. I built it from oak, Sarah made a pillow, and together we prepared a place where he could rest. No parent imagines that something made for their child will become his final resting place.
At St. Francis Xavier Cemetery, Journi was buried with prayer and dignity. For the first time since losing him, there was a sense of peace. Our son had not been forgotten or reduced to a medical procedure. He had been recognized as our child.
I hope other fathers and families will not be left uncertain about what they can do after pregnancy loss, but will be given the information and support needed to honour their child in a way that is meaningful to them."
Why Journi's Story Matters
Journi’s story is deeply personal, but the questions Sarah and Phillip faced are not unique to one family.
Families experiencing pregnancy loss may encounter uncertainty about burial, cremation, memorialization, spiritual or cultural support, and the respectful care of their child. Too often, access to that information depends on where a family is, which institution is involved, or whether they happen to find someone who knows what options are available.
The Journi May Dignity Initiative grew from the belief that clear information and compassionate support should not depend on chance.